A Heart Set on God — Grace to Overcome Ministries
I still remember the first Sunday I walked out of church alone. I made it to my car, sat down, and just watched. Watched the couples walk out together. Watched families pile into minivans. Watched everyone drive away to somewhere warm and full. My car felt so empty that day. Not just the seat beside me — all of it. Every quiet inch of it reminded me of what was no longer there. I cried most of that afternoon. Maybe all of it. I’m not sure I even made it home before the tears started.
But somewhere in the middle of that hard, quiet Sunday something rose up in me. Not strength exactly — more like stubbornness. I made myself a promise that day. I was not going to let Sunday destroy me.
I couldn’t change what had happened. I couldn’t fill that seat. But I could make a plan. And that plan — as simple and even silly as it sounds — is what carried me through some of the loneliest afternoons of my life. If Sunday afternoons are hard for you right now, I want to share what helped me.
1. Give Yourself a Place to Look Forward To
The first thing I did was find myself a place to eat after church. Now I know that might sound too simple to matter. But hear me out.
When you’re used to going somewhere together, Sunday lunch carries a lot of weight. So I found one spot — just mine. Nothing fancy. But it was my place, on my day, and I started to look forward to it. It gave me something to drive toward instead of just driving home to quiet.
It doesn’t have to be a restaurant. It could be a spot in the park with a packed lunch. A drive to somewhere pretty. A porch swing with something sweet. Just make it yours and make it something your heart can look forward to when you walk out of those church doors.
Give yourself something to look forward to. You deserve that.
2. Find a Hobby That Gets You Out of Your Head
The second thing I did was find a hobby. And I want to be clear — this wasn’t about staying busy just to stay busy. This was about giving my mind somewhere good to go. When you’re lonely your mind will lie to you. It will replay things. Rehash things. Ask questions that have no good answers. A hobby interrupts all of that. It doesn’t matter what it is. Gardening. Walking. Painting. Fishing. A craft. Something
that makes your hands move and your mind follow. Mine led me to disc golf and pickle ball. And what started as something to fill the quiet ended up becoming something I really enjoy and look forward too, even starting playing with my kids and others, something I never saw myself doing before. You just never know where a hobby will take you when you give it room to grow. And here’s the thing — your hobby doesn’t always have to be alone. Invite a friend. Call one of your kids. Make it a standing thing with someone you love. But don’t wait on anyone else to get started. Begin with yourself and let others join when they’re ready.
Get out of your head and into something that makes you feel alive again.
3. Make a Date With Yourself
This one might feel strange at first. It did for me too. We are so used to defining ourselves by our relationships. By who we are to someone
else. Wife. Partner. The other half of something. And when that’s gone it can feel like you don’t quite know who you are anymore standing alone. So take yourself on a date. I’m serious. Stop by your favorite place for ice cream. Go for a walk somewhere pretty. Sit in a coffee
shop with a good book. Whatever it is that you like — not what you compromised on, not what someone else preferred — what you actually enjoy. And while you’re there, don’t think about the past. Don’t rehearse the hurt. Instead have a quiet conversation with yourself about who you are looking forward to becoming when this season is over. Because she is in there. Still standing. Still worth knowing. This is how you start to find her. One Sunday afternoon at a time. You are not just killing time on a hard day. You are investing in the woman God is still
shaping. You are learning to enjoy your own company. And one day — I promise you this — you will look forward to that time alone instead of dreading it.
Date yourself. Get to know her. She is worth it.
4. Do Something You Wouldn’t Normally Do
This one is my favorite because it has a way of surprising you. Pick something outside of your normal Sunday routine. Something just a little out of your comfort zone. Not big or expensive or complicated. Just different. Go see a movie by yourself. Yes by yourself. It is not as scary as it sounds and nobody is watching you walk in alone I promise. Find a nature trail and walk it. Visit a farmers market. Drive to a town you’ve never explored. Take yourself to a botanical garden or a little antique shop on a back road somewhere. The point is not the destination. The point is that you are choosing to live on a day that used to feel like something to just survive. There is something powerful that happens when you do something new alone. It builds a quiet kind of confidence inside you. A voice that starts to whisper “I can do this.” And then a little louder “I am actually okay.” And eventually out loud “Look at me. Still here. Still going.” Every new thing you do alone is a small act of courage. And courage has a way of adding up. Sunday stopped being my hardest day when I stopped waiting for someone to do life with and started doing it anyway.
Try something new. Show yourself what you’re made of.
5. If You Have a Pet — Make It Their Special Day Too
I saved this one for last because it might be the sweetest one of all. If you have a fur baby — a dog, a cat, whatever little creature shares your quiet house with you — Sunday afternoon is your day together. And I mean really make it special. Take your dog for a longer walk than usual. Let them sniff everything. Let them be silly. Let you be silly with them. Take them to the pet store and let them pick out a treat. Yes
they will sniff every single one and yes it will make you laugh, and that laugh is exactly what you both need. Give your cat some extra attention. Sit on the porch together. Watch the birds. Just be still and present with the one little soul in your house who loves you unconditionally and has no idea your heart is hurting. There is something about an animal that has a way of pulling you right back into the
present moment. They don’t know about yesterday. They don’t worry about tomorrow. They just know you are there and they are so glad you are. And on a hard Sunday afternoon when the quiet feels heavy — that matters more than you know. Pack a bag. Grab the leash. Take your Bible. Find your favorite spot outside. And just breathe. You and your pet against the world. That’s enough for today.
And As Your Sunday Comes to a Close... At the end of the day, when the afternoon light starts to fade and the house gets quiet
again, I want you to do one last thing.
Don’t count what’s missing.
I know it’s tempting. The enemy will whisper it to you right there in the stillness. He’ll try to hand you a list of everything that isn’t there anymore. Every empty chair. Every silent phone. Every Sunday that used to look different. Don’t take that list. Instead close your eyes and thank God for what this Sunday was. Thank Him for the place you ate. For the hobby that made you smile. For the date you kept with yourself and what you learned about the woman you’re becoming. For the new thing you tried even though it scared you a little. For that sweet fur baby who thinks you hung the moon. Thank Him for you. Still here. Still standing. Still believing that better Sundays are
coming. Because they are. This season is not your ending. It is your becoming. And every Sunday you choose to live fully in it — even imperfectly, even through tears — you are writing a story of a woman who refused to be defeated. God sees every one of those Sundays. Every quiet car ride. Every brave lunch alone. Every walk. Every tear. And not one of them is wasted in His hands.
A Heart Set on God | Grace to Overcome Ministries
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